As a baby Christian, God continues teaching me huge lessons. I feel like a child constantly in 'time out.'
I want to give all of me to Him. I want to further His Kingdom and daily work for Him. I want to be there when any of His Children need a hand, need a shoulder to cry on or just need a friendly smile to see. I want to be the mother He planned for me to be. I want to be the wife He planned for me to be.
Anyone else see a problem developing here?
What am I living for? Am I pleasing all around me or God? If I live to satisfy this world, what good am I to God?
I am using today's post to speak to myself as well as warn others of the mess I created in my own life. God healed me, comforted me, loved me and saved me. He has a plan and purpose for my life (see Jeremiah 29:11). The more I say yes to whatever comes my way, the further I separate myself from His Plan. I fell in the trap of saying yes so as to feel needed. I fell in the trap of saying yes because what I said yes to was all good things working for God. If a task or job was presented to me, it must be what God wants me to do, right?
2-4Let me put this question to you: How did your new life begin? Was it by working your heads off to please God? Or was it by responding to God's Message to you? Are you going to continue this craziness? For only crazy people would think they could complete by their own efforts what was begun by God. If you weren't smart enough or strong enough to begin it, how do you suppose you could perfect it? Did you go through this whole painful learning process for nothing? It is not yet a total loss, but it certainly will be if you keep this up!
5-6Answer this question: Does the God who lavishly provides you with his own presence, his Holy Spirit, working things in your lives you could never do for yourselves, does he do these things because of your strenuous moral striving or because you trust him to do them in you? Don't these things happen among you just as they happened with Abraham? He believed God, and that act of belief was turned into a life that was right with God. (Galatians 3:2-6 - The Message)
Boy was I wrong. This seems to be the ongoing problem for me - acting on flesh before listening to spirit. I just wrote in a blog a couple days earlier about flesh or spirit. I believe God is screaming a message to me, I just fear following through with His answer to my prayers. His answer - this should be a no brainer! I am to do what He says, not what I say. I fear rejection and being worthless to everyone.
Guess what? None of us are worthless if we keep our focus on God. None of us rejected if we accept Him. None of us lost if we take each step in faith. A wise man in my life recently spoke these words to me- "Sometimes God wants you to say no to good things so you can say yes to something better." This same man also told me "God loves me just as I am. I was created in His Image. His love does not depend on my performance." I spoke in an earlier blog about being available. You can be available for God, but don't be available for this world. I found this to be such a fine line which I overstepped.
We all hold the freedom to say yes or no. God has been speaking to me since Easter. I am a SLOW learner and make many mistakes. I have placed blame elsewhere so it did not look as though I was saying no. This only caused hurt and pain to many I loved, including myself.
God placed me here to be Sheree. I do not need to be accredited in this world. I need to be the Sheree that God planned, say yes to where He wants me to go and focus on the loved ones He blessed me with in this world. My fears become reality when I lost sight of who God wants me to be.
God thank you for today. I am sorry I have not listened. You know me inside and out and You know I am a slow learner. I will understand, sometimes the hard way, what You have planned for me if only I am still and wait on You. You have spoke to me, screamed to me what I am to do. I am sorry I hurt others through this mess I created. I love You.
Keep praying harder than the devil can work.
Sheree Craig
Remember what Popeye says: "I am what I yam."
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