Thursday, October 8, 2015

Calm, Cool, Collective


Insomnia: difficulty falling or staying asleep.  Insomnia can be primary or secondary.  Primary is simply difficulty with sleep patterns and not associated with any physical, mental or spiritual ailment.  Secondary involves another factor: alcohol use, sleep apnea, depression, arthritis, heartburn, gastro difficulties, etc.  Insomnia can be acute (temporary due to situation) or chronic (long lasting). 

Diagnosing such condition does not take years of education landing an M.D. behind your name.  You will know when insomnia strikes. The first couple days may not phase you; but, as the dark circles appear, lethargic afternoons arise, coffee cups turn even darker and life begins running in slow motion, you will realize insomnia struck you. 
See, I suffer with insomnia and it is real.  I don’t struggle with the up all night, pacing the floors, unable to fall asleep kind of insomnia.  I struggle with restless sleep kind of insomnia.  In the past, it has been due to bladder overload and need to visit the restroom numerous times.  Now, it seems to be vivid dreams deterring my mind from restful sleep.  I will still wake up at least once and check the clock; but, then roll over and fall asleep.  The kicker is when I wake up with the alarm, I feel as though I slept for two minutes, not seven hours. 

A variety of regimens exist in this world to enhance sleep.  Little pills create deep sleep, yet come alongside undesirable side effects.  Setting up a routine may help the body realize when it is time to sleep; but, life quickly gets in the way of keeping up such routine.  Creating a peaceful atmosphere helps calm the body down; yet, remaining that way for seven hours straight is where I struggle.  My bedroom now glows from a wonderful salt lamp (to enhance relaxation) and my feet carry the odor of lavender oil nightly.  These work to help fall asleep, but dreams still occur fighting my peace at night.

The greatest thing that has helped thus far is feeding my body the proper nutrients throughout each day.  I now take whole supplements to provide missing nutrients/minerals in daily meals.  These provide a greater day, followed by a better night’s rest.  Some nights still create a battle for rest; but, the occurrence has decreased to a phenomenal degree. 
So, why all this gibberish about lack of sleep and battle of the mind at night?  Well, I recently had an AHA moment discovering some core reasons why suffering takes place when rest need be occurring.  I struggle with anxiety.  Not the real fight or flight anxiety.  Nope, my anxiety is totally brought on by the terrible battle occurring between the ears!  It takes a few hours to set in, but once the world begins for the day, anxiety starts to bubble.  First, a simmering begins with a few negative thoughts feeding the still calm waters; then, as moments filter through my mind, a small boil begins; finally, about midday, enough moments occurred to bring a rapid boil to the once calm waters.  I long to get back to calm, peace and positive mindset I had just hours before.  To battle I go in order to win over such negative atmosphere beating my spirit down.

Some days I bring just the right weaponry to win such a battle.  While other days I feel defeat due to faulty weaponry.  The weaponry in the form of a sword wielding Truth at this world allows for the heat to remain low and my spirit remain in a calm, collective and cool atmosphere.  Unfortunately, the enemy knows just when to step in and crank the heat high before I can even realize what happened.  It is then, I reach for the other weaponry in the form of fleshly desires placing only a temporary Band-Aid and actually feeding the fire.   
Ever feel like your day drained so much energy; yet, no physical exertion existed?  We can waist time, energy, emotion and thoughts by building anxiety driven environments for ourselves.  The battle between the ears can turn a perfect day into completely broken.  Leaving us in the dust, the negative day processes while we try and sleep.  No rest can be found in such an environment.  No outward sources can bring peace to such a battlefield.  Only One Internal Source holds the power to bring complete peace.  I realize now I spend way too much energy throughout the day living by my set standards, my created schedule and my temporary source of peace.  Therefore, all day long, I chase my tail in hopes to find calm.
 
Let us take a stand together against the negative forces of this world.  Let us no longer allow the enemy to steal our rest at night.  Take back our lives and enjoy what God has in store for this day.  How?  Place Truth in every moment of this day.  Cast all cares on God.  He is our anchor and will calm all stormy waters.  Save your energy for serving Him.

I am a working progress.  Rest is coming into my life and I am thankful to God for opening my once blind eyes.  I may not do it “right” every day; but, this I know. . .
I will continue to Pray harder than the devil can work.