70 X 7 - Really?

Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven. (Matthew 18:21-22)

Upon reading this passage from The Bible, I feel exhausted.  It is hard to imagine continually forgiving someone over and over without feeling like a doormat. 

Forgiveness of others is not necessarily for reconciliation, but to create peace in our heart, knowing we are treating others as Jesus would.  We must also remember to dismiss any anger by speaking in Truth and Love.  It becomes so easy to turn our anger into sin.  For example, we speak before praying, we retaliate, we stuff all inside and allow the devil that foothold to keep us in bondage or simply destroy a relationship because of lack of communication. 

My past displays many trials where all I did was blame others and stuff those emotions.  The devil took this and created a bondage to Anorexia.  I wanted to become invisible, because if you are not seen, you cannot be hurt, right?  I searched any vice I could get my hands on to fill the void inside and feel numb.  Although I was unaware, God was there with me.  He simply watched and said, "You think you can handle this without me, see how that works for you". 

Years later, I see I CANNOT handle anything without Him.  He has showed me where forgiveness must occur.  The ones who hurt me were not even aware of the hurt caused.  The unforgiveness only destroyed me inside.  My anger consumed me and my life was full of sin. 

I now strive to live as God directs me, leaving no anger left unattended.  We must not allow any anger to harbor and continue into the next day.  Each day holds enough troubles of it's own and bringing yesterday's into today would only create a way for the devil to enter and speak lies to us.  No good could come from this.  (see Ephesians 4:25-28)

God may I display forgiveness to all who hurt me daily.  I lift those up in prayer so for you to deal with their heart.  It is not my job to bring justification.  May You also search my heart and see if there is any offensive ways in me so you may lead me in the way everlasting (see Psalm 139:23-24).  Clearly show me the relationships which may be reconciled and those I simply need to forgive and let go. I love You.

Keep praying harder than the devil can work.
Sheree Craig