A problem occurs when the team underestimates their opponent. The lackadaisical attitude results in a loss. The opponent approaches the match with 100% effort in skill, strength and a spirit to perform with excellence. The opponent displays teamwork, communication, encouragement to one another and effort put forth from each player. Together, they shine and dominate the arrogant team.
The mindset to win backed with arrogant attitude will cause destruction. The mindset to play your very best backed with an encouraging attitude will always shine. If the score deems a loss, the team that worked together to the best ability still won in their hearts. They completed the game without pride, not passively and along the way provided positive feedback to one another. The team grew closer, learned more about how each played the game and will work together next time to an even greater level.
In comparison, the wide world of marriage requires each member to enter with one motive - to become one! Pride cannot exist in marriage. Lack of effort must be left at the altar. Criticism will not be accepted. As married couples, we must eliminate an outlook of opposition. If a spouse perceives the other as an opponent, the focus rests on weaknesses, lack of experience and where the other falls short in talents. We see what our spouse CAN'T do, not what they CAN do.
Each day passes with various 'games' existing. Each 'game' presents opportunity to be a team or be an individual. The moves we make depend completely on our attitude.
Marriages do not come with scorecards. So, avoid keeping track of who gives more effort in a 'game'. Each member should exert as much energy as possible and contribute the skills they posses. God created marriage for completion not competition.
"That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24)
"to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness."
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." (Ephesians 4:23-24;29)
Next time you see your spouse folded the laundry to help mark off a chore on your list; do not grumble or complain if the socks do not line up just right or a shirt needed to be on a hanger not folded. Thank him/her for taking that load off you and quietly put the clothes away. If you come home and the biscuits appear a little darker on the bottom or the meatloaf just does not taste like your momma's; avoid criticizing or downgrading his/her effort to put a warm meal in your stomach. Instead, chew each bite with love and gratitude for the contribution given by your teammate.
Overall, love one another, focus on positives, encourage and allow your teammate some playing time without constant criticism. Remember, we each married a sinner. Each day we will fall short of God's glory. You are not perfect and neither is your spouse. But, together, working to complement one another; the two shall become one. Place God at the center of marriage and see your spouse through His eyes. God created each of you with a purpose and plan. Encourage each other to fulfill the plan and love as God loves.
Come together in unity, as a team. Do not continue marriage as an individual, in division.
Live to serve one another. Offer a compliment each day. View the other through God's eyes. Encourage always.
God, thank you for another day. Thank You for carefully choosing my teammate in life. I feel blessed each time I see him walk through the door. Continue to guide me and keep my eyes focused on positive contributions from my husband, not when he chooses to sit the bench. Help me encourage my husband, respect him and love him as no one else on Earth can. Lead me to be the wife You intend. I love You.
Keep praying harder than the devil can work.
Sheree Craig
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