Think about the following question for a minute
before continuing to read. What does it
mean to live?
Some may correlate the word with alive. In that case, the answer arrives simply by
checking the function of lungs/heart. Is
that it? As long as breath enters and
blood pumps throughout the body, we are living?
No, no, no, go back to the original question: What does it mean to live?
I can tell you that the body given, organs
placed strategically by a Mighty Physician, features aligned just so to provide
a unique and beautiful vessel and all this working together daily does not sum
up living. That equates being
alive. I want to talk about living. See, I spent 6+ days alive (at times I was
not so sure), but not living. My lungs
worked (the continuous hacking confirmed that), the heart continued to beat (at
times boiling blood confirmed by the thermometer displaying triple digits) and
each system kept trucking along fighting off such a terrible virus. But, no part of those 6+ days I would
consider living. I existed, as a lump on
the couch whose presence was known by random moaning and hacking so loud the
neighbors could hear.
I sat and watched the other members of the home
live. The scenes were difficult to watch
as I knew I could not play a part. The laughter
beautiful, but brought jealousy due to lack of energy to join. The peace filled home continued just as is
without any contribution from me. The
sad part about the whole situation: had I not been down with the virus, I am
not sure I would be taking part in such fun, laughter and peace anyway.
See, I have been alive for 30+ years, heart
beating and lungs breathing; but, I can count on one hand how many of those
years I actually spent living. I have
been too caught up in society to live.
10 Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of
God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please
people, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10
Yep, win the approval of human beings hijacked each day. Therefore, I worked diligently to clean the
house spotless daily (endless job with kids), place exercise as a requirement
in order to eat, spent time nitpicking in front of the liar of a mirror, put
everything in its place and worked with all effort to look perfect on the
outside. Meanwhile, my children wanted
to play Legos, show mom their newest skill, color together, watch their
favorite movie together and just get a hug.
My husband wanted attention, to talk about his day, a kiss from his wife
and to relax in our home. I had this
living thing all wrong.
Coming down with the virus is not something people
desire. But, I will say I am thankful
for every lesson learned while caught up in this storm of pain, weakness and
suffering. It brought humility, reality
check and a stronger faith.
Humility in the form of allowing others to do something for
me due to the fact I could not even make it to the restroom without crawling
(slowly at that). Reality check in the
form of watching what goes on in the home whilst I would have been cleaning,
organizing and stressing about preparation for the following day. Stronger faith in the form of feeling the
arms of God hold me tightly through each moment of healing. God and I held many conversations pertaining
to the steps required for healing. He
provided encouragement, strength and hope while providing many lessons along
the way. God is good ALL the time!
So, back to the original question. . . What does it mean to live?
Are you living or just alive? Take a moment and check on that answer. Living involves loved ones surrounding,
embracing, laughing, helping and loving as God intended. Living involves purpose, focus on serving and
caring for the body provided. The Mighty
Physician provided all needed to be alive in the womb; but, left one piece open
which is required for living. The Holy
Spirit fits perfectly into position and living can begin. We must invite the Holy Spirit into our
lives. And. . .
Keep praying harder than the devil can work.
Sheree Craig