Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Listen - Then Speak




As the pride begins to diminish and wounds receive proper care, the team called marriage grows in strength.  Still two individuals working diligently to mesh as one, a factor remains missing. . .

2)  Communication along with listening.  Communication involves a realm of details.  One most important is listening to the communicator.  Another detail includes choosing the battles which to communicate.  A final one I will discuss is communicating in a way which builds not destroys!

God created mankind without abandoned detail.  He touched each fiber placing each piece exactly where He deemed best.  We now must use such a vessel as intended.  Just as failure to use an item properly leads to faulty equipment; failure to use our bodies in ways intended leads to less than desired results.  Take a look in the mirror – for different reason than I have asked in the past – see the reflection and study carefully.  God provided ONE mouth and TWO ears!  Hmmmmm.  Do you think possibility exists that the ears play a greater role than the mouth?

Listening to our spouse, hearing the words spoken and understanding what breaks their heart will solve many marriage problems.  Lay down pride.  Leave it at the cross.  You will not always be correct in every situation.  Women, even when we are completely 100% correct, does it really harm us to let the guys think they are correct?  Men, even when you know logically what the best decision would be in a situation, does it really harm you to allow the girls to do it their way?  You never know, the guys may have a much better take on the situation or the way the girls accomplished the goal was a pretty cool idea.  Let each other have that moment – the moment of being correct!  God does not sit up in Heaven taking score of who is correct more often and rank in prestige. 

Choose your battles; difficult due to each feeling importance in things that bother, hurt or sadden, right?  Well, my dear friends, some things just do not matter.  Before speaking a word, ask yourself if the factor at hand is worth the growing moment.  I agree that when a spouse chooses to crunch ice loudly for all to hear, a growing moment can take place.  ;-)  In all seriousness, choose the battles which to pour forth energy.  In doing so, you may find that God uses that battle not chosen to shape and mold your character – forming an even greater you to be used for His Glory.  Love your spouse where they are and pray them to where they need to be.  Condemnation only leads to a defensive receiver.  As you lay your head down at night, turn each growing moment and the battles not chosen over to God – He will do amazing work overnight and present the solution to you in the morning.  Rest peacefully.

Let us build one another up and encourage as the Bible commands.  Your spouse is the one person in this world who loves you regardless of what happened in the world today.  Together, you both work as a team to navigate through such a broken world.  Coming home to a nagging wife or critical husband will not fulfill the command of building up and encouraging.  We receive enough negativity, criticism and hateful actions the hours spent outside the home.  Set up the home environment to be one filled with love, forgiveness, peace and joy.  Take a moment and read the following Scripture. . .

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” 
(1 Corinthians 13:4-7)           

Sound familiar?  The Scripture probably appeared during the ceremony which legally consecrated the marriage.  Have you ever revisited such heavy Truth?  Read it again, only this time exchange the word love for your name.  After each statement spoken with your name inserted, ask yourself if the statement is true or false.  Communication is not limited to words spoken.  It also occurs in actions, body language, attitudes and lack of words spoken.  Let this Scripture be a goal to work towards each day.  Take one that seems hardest for you and work toward improving that area.  See how your spouse responds!  Let God use this Scripture to bind the marriage even more than its current state.

More tomorrow. . .


Until then Keep praying harder than the devil can work.  

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